But then the strangest thing happened. Despite everything, I felt myself becoming aroused. I was stepping back into my fantasy again. I was being used...and abused and degraded. I was about to be gang raped again!I was getting incredibly turned on. I was thankful that they were so rough. They were so self involved that I was certain that they wouldn't notice. And I was glad. That would be too humiliating.I realized that I could enjoy this, not just because it was my fantasy. I could enjoy this. I went to give her a hug, but she just pushed me asidesaying that I was starting at military school.The next day, Mum took me downtown. I was in despair when she took me tothe barber shop. The barber was told to give me a very short haircut. Icried no and struggled in the chair. It is only when Mum started cryingthat I was quiet. However I was silent. Now it was my turn to cry. Everycut of the scissors felt like the punches that the boys gave me.At home, my nails were cut short and I was told. More

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