Hedonism is all I appear to have left. Or is that just an excuse for my immoral behaviour? Do I believe my own lies in order to really deceive others ...ore skilfully? I’m having a mid-life crisis. Fack. My whole life has been a facking crisis: c***dhood anxiety giving way to teenage angst. I pick up a copy of The Daily Sport which a passenger has given me from the day before. I read the ‘massage’ ads. One stands out: Blonde 21 year old with tanned 36-24-36 figure, Bournemouth. I ring the number.. Ya want ta be an evolved being? I have just the thing!" ALAKAZAM!"CHAPTER 2Hitler lost his breath as water swirled all around him. He floated in the bright, clean liquid environment frantic with the expectation of drowning. He stared with amazement at his nose, which looked huge and gray. As he tried to swim for the surface and air, he realized his arms were gone and his legs seemed to be fused into a far shorter, lower part of his body. He saw the light of the surface above and floated as best. More

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