My phone associated caller ID numbers with names from its address book. My brother was listed, appropriately, as Shithead. He called. Dory said, ‘He...lo Shithead’ and handed me the phone. ‘What the fuck was that about?’ he asked. ‘I’m living with a psychic,’ I replied. ‘She read your personality through the phone.’ When my friends asked who that strange girl was answering my phone, I told them I paid extra for service like that. We took long walks in the evenings. I quickly learned not to be. At the time I was closing in on 40 years old but still had the libido of a 16yo! Like today, I was fit back then and while not a gym rat, I didn’t hesitate to take my shirt off to mow the lawn. I’m the nice-neighbor kind of guy who has a better than average Dad-Bod. I’m white with an olive complexion, 5’9” and just about 160 pounds, lots of dark hair, green eyes and have a wiry build. So back then I joined an online “alternative” adult dating site. Pretty soon after I got way more than I. More

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