I never want to see you again...I'll call the police...you're a bastard," were just some of the choice remarks my mom rained down on my departing back... 2:45 a.m. PARENTS BEDROOM"Where were you? Was it that bastard Parker?" Dad demanded, his hate for the man obvious. As I watched them on the grainy tape I realized that maybe dad had known what had been going on."No." Who was it then?" I don't know." You don't fucking know!" dad screamed. "Weren't your fucking eyes open?" He was in a costume.". Naturally, two minutes after I declared the yard a poop-free zone, I had to fetch a bag to pick up the latest offering. Just as nature abhors a vacuum, dogs somehow manage to summon up just a little bit more as soon as they see a pristine lawn. I had to laugh. I swear Max was gloating. You know that prideful way dogs scratch at the grass with their back legs? No sign of shame or penitence there.I hit the grocery store just before eight, for maximum choice of steaks, and found some great-looking. More

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