"What is the matter, my dear? Surely it cannot be so dire. You've already said we defeat the Blight." We do. But after that ... there's going to be a ...ar. Between mages and templars. The specifics don't matter, particularly, but there are two things that can, possibly, slow things down and restore some sanity. One I am taking care of, and I will not tell you. But the other ... you need to know that the trigger, the one who truly starts the war, is Kirkwall's Knight-Commander – Meredith. ..1. Sex would smell like chocolate2. Farts would smell like roses3. Dogs would smell spring fresh4. Babies would come from vending machines5. Men would be born with a permanent erection6. All women would have the same size breasts7. There would be no cellulite8. Every food on the planet would be FAT FREE9. Men would be born with an “OFF” switch10. There would be no “Hooters”11. A man’s paycheck would be made payable to his wife12. All menstrual cycles would be replaced with a 5-8 day vacation. More

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