Then learn to live with that. I found that a fifty- fifty mix wasn't bad, but still not strong enough. So I went with about a 70-30 leaning toward the...dark roast. It worked out to be close enough for me to live with. Of course by then I was so wired I couldn't sleep.When I am wired and don't feel like going out, or if I been out and failed to find anyone, I go to the Internet. I can always go to the chat rooms and find someone who presents an absolutely perfect image of himself. I usually wind. But she knows, I just know it. The way she keeps looking at me from time to time, with that look of lowly pity... and disgust.Well what the hell does she want from me? Not everyone can be as good as she is! Not every one can be righteous and sinless. I have to pay the bills somehow.Besides, what's it too her that I do what I do? She doesn't know the hours I put in the gym, toning my body to perfection. She doesn't know how it's like performing before a bunch of salivating men. Its hard work.. More

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