" Only six or seven times, but I knew after the first time, I would eventually have to give in. They always played a tape for me while I was tied to ...he horse about people tied up, being whipped, and all sorts of hurtful things. I told myself I didn't want to condition myself to accept pain as pleasure so I gave in. Hell, I'm not even sure if they just played those sadistic tapes just to give me a rationalization to give in." Probably a little of both, after a few years they probably would. "My German Shepherd." "And Jack?" "Daniels."Chapter IV. The next two days are kind of a blur. Not because I got drunk -- I didn't, by the way -- but because I was in shock, I guess. I was effectively on auto-pilot, only doing the barest minimum of things necessary to survive. I ran a lot. I ate when I got hungry, which wasn't very often. I smoked some cigars. Mostly, I cried for Kim. I reviewed Kim's death a thousand times in my mind. I examined my actions, her actions, even Slick. More

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