,” she started to stammer.“Don’t worry, Honey, and take your time. I’m a very good listener.”She took a breath. “You got cheated too.”I ...as puzzled. “And how was I cheated?” I asked.Her eyes focused on my chest and her face screwed up into fierce concentration as she forced the words out. “Y-you d-didn’t get t-to- to test-drive me.”Well. I wasn’t expecting that.“What do you know about ‘test-drives’?” As soon as I said it, I could have kicked myself. She’s been through a pickup. I was there.. . Are you k**ding me? He's a teenage boy with a crush on you! A little bit of cuddling and kissing with you looking like this will make his whole day." I-I ... have to ... k-k-kiss him?" she stammered."You are un-fucking-believable, Mom. Is this Victorian England? ... Hello? ... He's my best friend and he thinks you're quite the Milf. ... You mean to tell me that you're so prissy and straight-laced that you won't let my friend have a couple of kisses? I don't believe this!"Robert was getting. More

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