But, I was young and dumb and just wanted the attention. I liked being fucked and played with and actually looked forward to Ben because I did have th...se wonderful orgasms. I didn't know how to be romanced. My heart wanted the romance, my body craved the sex. My body won. But, my heart was empty.Yes, I understand. I'm not making excuses. Writing this, I reflected on a possibility of why or how things happened. I am what I am. I cannot change the past and I just accepted it and tried to learn.. "Would you like a drink of water Mr. Eldon?" The nurse asked and then without waiting for my answer she reached over and filled a plastic cup from an orange plastic pitcher and then held the cup near my mouth while supporting the back of my head with one of her hands.I drank."Only a few hours," She answered my earlier question. "You haven't been with us very long at all." More water." My voice sounded better that time. Yet, somehow it didn't sound like my voice at all.The nurse filled the cup. More

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