Some blonde actress was telling Leno about some movie that Burton would never see, or if he did catch it on cable a year from now, he'd never remember...that she'd once told him and 30 million other people how wonderful the making of it had been. He got up and went to the bathroom, pretending he wasn't going to see if there was anything more interesting happening on that other TV set with only one channel.He gazed idly over at his louvered window. The shade was lower this time; the show was. My mouth opened and closed like a fish but no sound came out, as they all looked at me expectantly. “Deuce!” was the umpire’s response. The decision was taken for me, but Mrs MacDonald stood staring at me, then the umpire, then me again, shaking her head as she did so. Her eyes dropped to stare at my groin and then fixed me in a glare, her face bright red, clearly furious at the decision and my part in it. She turned to the umpire and was almost about to say something before changing her. More

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