." I shook my head, suddenly terrified by what we were doing.I couldn't do it, I didn't want to. I mean I did want to, more than anything. I wanted to...make love to him, to let him do whatever he wanted with me. I wanted to just give myself to Levi forever ... But I couldn't. I just couldn't for some reason. I was a virgin and I had to stay that way, didn't I? This was gonna be wrong and it didn't make any sense, since it had been perfectly okay just a second before. What was different? I didn't. It hit me then that these beautiful girls were becoming sexy. I shook the thought out of my head at the time, but it creeped me out that it had happened. That first summer was the hardest. Seeing my amazing sisters at the pool, at the beach, at their sports competitions. Whenever Jax finished with the game winning goal, she'd run to me and jump in my arms, and I'd feel the eyes of the jealous, lusting boys on me. As time went on, I learned to contain my strange, disgusting feelings. I was. More

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