He tries to talk me out of it, but I insist. He has me sign a form saying I am volunteering and takes me to the room.We enter the room, which is only ...bout 10 X 10 feet and VERY warm. There is a tiny cage in one corner with a thick pad on the floor. Outside the cage there is an angled bench that I recognize as a medical device that you would lay on to get an "exam". There are also some chains attached to a pole and shower head on the wall. He shoves me in and tells me to strip and shower. As. I have no idea even his name. Even where he is. What he is. Just the substance of all of the ones before who chorded and then turned their backs and walked away and I wanted to scream at them I wouldn’t have done it to you…And the chords play under my fingers. Cum yet? Have I allowed myself time? Too fast? Too slow? Disinterested. Would he click off? What would I care? I care and I play the chords. And I think one fine day I will not be here, one fine day there will be a sun shine day that will. More

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