Maybe I wouldn't be where I was now. But, she wasdead. Victim of an 'accidental' overdose. About as accidental as I wasplanning."You know. You're ...ne of the lucky ones who got to spend at least partof their lives as a woman. Look at me...I'm nearly sixty, I've been wearingdresses as long as I can remember and I will NEVER look like a woman!Christ. I just want this over with. I'm so tired of living a lie!Jahna just looked at me with those big blue eyes. I saw a tear slowlycrawl down her. Violence had become a mainstay in my home. I feared him more with each passing year. It wasn’t long after the beatings and verbal and emotional abuse started that marital rape became my constant nightmare that I couldn’t seem to escape from. The openness we once shared was shattered time and again after the beatings and hurtful words wasn’t enough to satiate his growing anger. I remember times of laying on the floor, bleeding, broken and bruised and having my clothing ripped from my body and. More

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