He died not knowing that he would someday win the "coolest headstone" contest."Five rules for men to follow for a happy Life"1. It's important to have...a woman who helps at home, cooks from time to time, cleans up, and has a job.2. It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh.3. It's important to have a woman who you can trust, and doesn't lie to you.4. It's important to have a woman who is good in bed, and likes to be with you.5. It's very, very important that these four women do not. I knew better than to protest as Lucille held the remote in plain view. We all got into the car with me in the back. I could feel the pickle in my ass, it was really uncomfortable. I wondered how I would ever get it out or what would happen in the future with it inside me. ?Now here?s the deal Christine. We?re going to the mall. You?re going to get a few girly accessories. You are going to be left alone, but never far enough away from this remote. Remember that if you try anything funny. More

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