I went for my nightly walks, taking the dog with me. I sat on the bank’s edge by the creek and bawled my eyes out. My family needed me, but I couldn...��t give them anything of myself. I had nothing to give. Why me? Why the hell me? Why let me fall in love so deeply, only to take it away from me? I couldn’t come to terms with the loss at all. At any point in any day, I would burst into tears. The loss of control I felt when these tears smothered me, scared me to death. I could be in my car driving. I was going to have her naked, so she did not care what the bag did to her hair.During the drive I asked her about one other surprise I had in mind, something I did not define. She was thrilled and put herself in my hands, I was sure that she would be delighted, but it was not something she would expect, it might even shock her until she got it figured out. I did assure her there was no physical pain involved ... unless she asked very nicely.When we got to my safe house I led her downstairs. More

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