I asked if I could join her and she said yes.I’d known Pauline since the third grade and at one time or another I had considered asking her out but ...ad never gotten around to it. I asked her how she’d been and she said:“Lonely.”“Why?”“Seth moved to Detroit with his parents when his father got promoted and transferred.”“I would think with Seth being out of the way you would have a whole herd of guys banging on the door.”“Not many know that Seth is gone.”“Then I guess I get to be the first to ask. It certainly was a step up, at least, from the cold, awkward silencethat was our lives before. That's not to say that things felt normal,though. I was still feeling as stuck as ever, never leaving the housenor taking any visitors. Even with Lauren, I wasn't the same. Wedidn't talk about certain things, such as my desire for men. We didn'tkiss or show affection like a regular couple. I was still eating my cumpackets twice a day while Lauren busied herself in another room. But wetried to. More

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