” She started to say something but I told her to save it until we got back home. Once we went by Barbara and Fretail, I motioned them to come back t...o. I parked in the garage and said, “Everyone in the main cave, right now. Gerona, get the rest of the family and meet us there.”Barb and Fretail came in and I told them to go to the main cave. I fumed in the garage a few minutes calming down. I walked in and everyone tried to talk at once. I held up my hand and asked for silence. “Now I have. Q. If you were lost in the woods, who would you trust fordirections: an in-tune bagpipe player, an out-of-tunebagpipe player, or Santa Claus? A. The out-of-tune bagpipe player. The other two indicate youhave been hallucinating.Q. How do you make a chain saw sound like a bagpipe? A. Add vibrato.Q. What’s the definition of a gentleman? A. Someone who knows how to play the bagpipe and doesn’t.Q. What’s the difference between a dead snake in the road anddead bagpiper in the road? A. Skid marks in. More

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