"Papers, Sir?" he asked in a monotone. Seeing the couple, he yelled past Yvgeny, "hey you, fuck off!" To emphasise the order, he poked the long barrel...of a bayoneted military rifle at the pathetic pair."That's not necessary!" Yvgeny told the man, outraged. "They're exhausted!" I must keep the doorway clear," he explained."Fine, let them inside," Yvgeny replied. The man, though, grinned as if he had made a joke. "You two," Yvgeny told them, "inside, here!"The Bellhop's jaw sagged in shock."You. Sharon, my wife of twenty years, looked at me and asked if we were expecting someone.“No,” I responded as I shuffled towards our front door and looked out the peep hole. It was Jackie, the single and quite attractive next door neighbor. I opened the door and immediately noticed she had a panicked look on her face.“There’s water all over my kitchen floor,” she pleaded, “Can you help me?”I looked at Sharon, who seemed rather indifferent at the intrusion.“Sure,” I replied, “Let me grab my tool. More

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