Playing with my phone and eating a snack. It seemed that some canned peaches were the only food I could trust wasn’t tainted by her evil influence, ...nd even at that I checked every bite for semen. It would’ve been no shock to find her hand in the cannery or some such nonsense. Such was my belief in her diabolical plots. Of course it didn’t last. Why would it? I received her text as the clock struck midnight. Ugh. Couldn’t she ever do anything without being dramatic? Once again, as if reading. ’A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, took the husband aside, and said, ‘I don’t like the looks of your wife at all.’‘Me neither doc, ‘ said the husband. ‘But she’s a great cook and really good with the kids.’An old woman goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse she has been living with for the last 40 years.The Wizard says, ‘Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you.’The old woman says without. More

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