But whatever I did, Icouldn't seem to build to an anything like a final crescendo, I was kepthanging.I let my mind wander. I really wanted to orgasm; ...o feel that release.Tension and frustration only made it worse. I wondered if having sex witha guy would make me reach the peak, and better than I felt right now.What was it like to be penetrated?I briefly thought of inviting Jackson over and seducing him, but commonsense told me to completely reject that little scheme.Where were these thoughts. It was as if he simply couldn't comprehend why I'd want to talk to him or why he'd be interested in listening."Interesting," he said. Then he turned back to his magazine.Jared always did have a way of frustrating me. In this case, he wasn't holding a conversation with me. I'd imagined this moment thousands of times over the last year. There were so many things that I wanted to say to him. I'd practiced answering any and all questions that I was sure he'd ask. I had responses to all of them and. More

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