What the tribune's reporters failed to make note of was my arrival around eleven PM that fateful November second evening, after what my mother swore t... her dying day was eleven months of pregnancy. I came out in a rush and so did several vote counts in southern Illinois. As eveyone knew within hours, Dewey did not defeat Truman, and apparently the tide turned shortly after my arrival. Coincidence? Shurely you jest. Sadly I've been unable to pull any other electoral miracles. For instance I. Of course, I'm the one she blamed for it. She was yelling at me when I told her that the movie she got tickets for wasn't the PG film she told Mom she was going to see and "Pint" came out of her mouth. Then she told her friends I wasn't big enough to be a half pint, so that made me a pint. I tried to explain to them that a half of a pint was smaller than a full one, but my sister and her friends aren't the brainiest girls in the crowd. I think there was a combined allotment for brains and tits. More

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