There was one thing I knew they had there, because I'd seen it dozensof times, that I suddenly really really wanted.Audrey, the little old Christian l...dy who works there Saturdays,nearly spit her gum out when I got to the counter."You want to buy that?" she asked, entirely incredulously."Yes."I tried to think of something clever."It's a joke," I lied, "for a friend, for his stag."She just looked at me, and took my twelve dollars.As soon as I got home, I stripped naked, and plopped myself down. ." I took a breath. "you know ... down there. So can I do that?" What?" She has a feeding tube in her arm," I said. "She's hungry and wants me to take her to the kitchen to get her something to eat. Can I pull her feeding tube out? And that catheter thing between her legs that goes to the bag?" No!" shouted the woman. "We'll send somebody right over, but this better not be a prank!"The ambulance arrived in full glory, with lights and siren going full blast. A man and a woman got out. The woman. More

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