At that moment it dawned on me that, far from being given the chance toexperience my own fantasy, I was playing the lead role in someone else's.That o... a man - or men - I hadn't even met. Alarmingly they had gone toextraordinary lengths to set this up. So what did they expect in return?One drunken evening with Mary I'd confessed that I dreamed of beingforced to comply with a man's wishes, being dressed as a girl and simplyhaving to do what I was told. She'd agreed to arrange it for me,. I imagined being slam fucked like in a hardcore flick. I longed for male odors, hairy chests, balding foreheads, greying hair. The man of my wet dreams was never to be seen on porn magazines. However, being seen together with someone old enough to be my father, even in a bar or a club, there was no way. I would'nt talk about it to my friends either, because I didn't want to sound creepy. Thus, being sexually dominated by a mature male remained just a closeted and pervasive obsession of mine.. More

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