I avoiding all the drama had refused all the invitations from the boys and decided to go by myself so that I could hide the fact that I was mildly int...xicated and high. I was a tiny girl barely weighing 120 lbs, tall at five foot nine and long blonde hair that billowed in light fluffy curls down my back to my ass. I chose a long almost sheer purple dress with a little glitter and purple tulle in layers down to the floor. I looked like a princess straight out of a fairytale and I was so happy to. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you!”The husband, being a typical non-romantic male, replied: “Am on the toilet ... Please advise.”At an Irish wedding the minister offered this toast:“Marriage is the union of two people who bring meaning to one another and make their life bearable. Will all the men please go stand beside that one person who has made their life bearable!”The bartender was almost crushed to death.These are compliments of. More

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