”E.J. Holub, Kansas City Chiefs linebacker regarding his twelve knee operations: “My knees look like they lost a knife fight with a midget.”Vic ...raden, tennis instructor: “My theory is that if you buy an ice cream cone and make it hit your mouth, you can learn to play tennis. If you stick it on your forehead, your chances aren’t as good.”Walt Garrison, Dallas Cowboys fullback when asked if Tom Landry ever smiles: “I don’t know. I only played there for nine years.”John Breen, Houston Oilers: “We. We found that the combination of drinking and smoking got us very horny and lowered our inhibitions.I enjoyed hearing her talk dirty, and helped get horny by having her repeat phrases back to me. I had her say, “I really hope the neighbors are watching me take my clothes off,” or “I really hope someone can see my tits,” or “I wonder if I'm giving one of the neighbor men a hard on,” or “I wonder if any of the neighbor boys are jacking off right now while I'm naked and playing with my self.” One. More

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